wow...it's x'mas party there too...?

had one of my other worldly dreams again last night. seemed like there was a big big fancy christmas-like party going on..except most of the people i saw there were once with us but have since moved on, if you know what i mean..the scene was very much like the ending part of the titanic movie..people cheering, smiling..welcoming me to their party and yes, i did feel like jack dawson (or was it rose who was being welcomed [in the movie at the end, i meant]..hmm, nvm) for that tiny moment..

of course, dad was there, and i saw grandpa and grandma dancing a slow waltz..and everyone was just watching, cheering and clapping them on..i pulled up a chair and just sat there for a long time watching them dance and felt so so full of love for them..dad appeared like he was mulling over something, then walking around as though searching for someone and was kinda quiet..i guess he was just being his usual self. the rest of the people i could not really focus my eyes on except somehow knowing that they were not of the physical type. for a very fleeting moment, i thought i also saw someone who wasn't supposed to be there and i suppose because of that, i just very quickly erased it from my mind and when i woke up this morning, i could not remember who that person was...oh dear....this is really disturbing.....maybe i need to revisit this party to see who this person is clearly..

i think i am getting quite used to these other worldly visitations that i get now and then. i am no longer frightened of these visits. in fact, i kinda look forward to them, sometimes just for entertainment, at other times because i miss grandpa and grandma and i just want to feel close to them. perhaps, one night, i shall have a close enough encounter with someone outside of my family circles and bring back some incontrovertible evidence..and then maybe i'd know for sure that i have not just been dreaming dreams...

for now..it's an earthly x'mas season as usual for me..